Ok ladies, yall had the chance to state and voice your views on how yall feel about his opinion, well it’s his turn to take the floor…….
Firstly, if you laughed throughout the previous article, pat yourself on the back. You have a sense of humor!
I’m afraid that in a quest to find their natural selves; some of these women have mixed and lost their self-worth in their hair. It would seem some of you have become close-minded to the very thing you accuse me of being close-minded about. If someone doesn’t wholly believe in natural hair, you scream witch, tossing weaves and wigs upon kindled fire while waiting for the individual to be burned at stake! If a bended knee isn’t taking to the natural hair altar, you wish him stoned!? What is this, The Crusades?
I’m led to believe that some of you think if a man doesn’t love your hair, he doesn’t love you. If your hairstyle is the foundation of your relationship, I pity you. Is your relationship therapist your hair stylist? Is your favorite hair product your god? (I’m only dramatizing for emphasis.) Are you not more than your hair, permed or natural?
Besides, if you’re looking for a “Man” who totally agrees with everything you do good luck with that! Or maybe the confusion is in the definition? There’s a difference in being supportive and being docile. Let’s be honest. How many of you want a man who doesn’t challenge you mentally? What about spiritually? But then you expect him not to have an opinion on physical matters, sending him into timeout if he dares speak in opposition? Unrealistic! Me supporting the natural hair movement (and I mean financially) and having a different hair preference is as simple as me liking the woman but not liking the dress, or the shoes, or the nail color, etc. That doesn’t measure her worth to me, neither is she defined by it. It’s a dress! It’s only a matter of taste and style. I don’t mean to be offensive, but if that’s how your man is, who’s really the “Man” in the relationship? Who’s eating the cake Anne Mae? (That’s a joke btw)
And to be honest some of the “Love me or Leave me alone” views are why so many women have been done just that and Left Alone! If a man approaches you with the same views you’d call him a dog, misogynistic and chauvinistic. How stubborn and arrogant is that train of thought? I’m not saying one should toss their beliefs asides for the sake of acceptance, but if you let a good man go because he doesn’t like (but is willing to tolerate) your hair, (let me articulate this right… -clears throat-) you S.T.U.P.I.D.!
Lastly, I don’t know how it became a topic of race. I’ve seen women of every race whose hair I wasn’t fond of at some point; “Asian” hair is just my way of saying straight and silky. This is all too possible with natural hair. I’ve seen it with my own eyes! [Gabby cue the link] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_EaMZtg1n0
But since the race subject did come up, let’s delve into it shall we. I find it arrogant, ironic and downright two-faced that some readers say that because of these “black man” views they don’t date African American men. Well isn’t that the Uncle Tom calling the kettle black. My preference is simply one of style, while yours is lifestyle and I’m wrong? You’ve already bought into the social stereotype of what “Black” men are, dated/ or married outside your race, yet speak “Pro-Black” (with finger snapping n neck rolling included), yet your lifestyle is contrary. I bet you still believe the white man’s ice is always colder huh? Notice my gf is a natural hair wearing Afro-American! =P
So my question is this: should I love you all and hate all the other African-American women who don’t have natural hair? See the beauty of opinion, preference, and simply choice is I can love both types of woman, and not like the hair.
It’s a preference, humans have it, you have, and I have it. So relax (No pun intended)! You can cut the Angela Davis antics! It’s cool though, I don’t blame you all. I blame Tyler Perry!
In short, love your hair, but don’t become defined by it. And with that being said… She without sin cast the first bottle of perm! (I don’t know how it fits but I think it’s funny!)
– Sincerely, Gabby’s Angry Black Man.